


Denial

by Intrepid_Inkweaver



Series: Tales of the Sole Survivor [3]
Category: Fallout (Video Games), Fallout 4
Genre: Angst, F/M, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-18
Updated: 2017-09-18
Packaged: 2018-12-31 05:08:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 629
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12125175
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Intrepid_Inkweaver/pseuds/Intrepid_Inkweaver
Summary: Thea has just met her sixty-year-old baby boy and takes it about as well as can be expected. Nick is there to catch her when she falls.





	Denial

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt was: "You look exhausted."

Thea was seated on the edge of the bed, staring at the floor between her feet, her arms limp at her sides. Nick could see dark circles underneath her eyes and every once in a while a tiny shiver would wrack her frame, only visible in the way she clamped down on her fingers. He quietly went to sit beside her, and she didn’t react.

  
“You look exhausted,” he said softly after a moment of silence.

  
She gave a minute nod. Slowly, she moved her hands to her lap to stare at them instead of the floor. “I haven’t slept in while,” she finally answered hoarsely.

  
“How long’s a while?”

  
“Don’t know. Days, at least.”

  
“Thea, look at me,” Nick said gently. Slowly she lifted her tired, bloodshot eyes to meet his. (She’d once told him how beautiful she thought his eyes were, like golden suns in the dark. She’d been drunk at the time, though--he’d had to almost carry her back to Home Plate. For so many reasons, he’d never told her how beautiful he found her eyes--the same reasons he kept so many other things pertaining to his thoughts about her to himself. He had a feeling she knew them all the same.)

  
“What happened?” he asked softly, reaching over to grasp her hand.

  
She opened her mouth, but she couldn’t seem to make any sound come out. Quickly, she looked away and he could hear her breathing deeply, as she did when she was trying to keep from crying. He felt her fingers tighten on his hand and he instinctively squeezed them gently. Finally, she turned back towards him--but didn’t meet his eyes. “My son. He’s not a baby anymore. And he’s not a ten-year-old either.” Her face crumpled. “He’s sixty years old. My baby boy…” She choked on a sob as tears escaped her eyes to run down her cheeks. “I didn’t get to see him grow up--I wasn't _there_ for him…”

  
Nick reached out to pull her close to him so that she could rest her head against his shoulder. He held her close while she cried, clinging to his jacket with one hand, the other not relinquishing her hold on his hand. Into her hair, he murmured, “I’m sorry, doll. I’m sorry for everything.”

  
When she’d finally calmed down, she slowly sat up again and wiped the tears from her face with the hand that wasn’t still clinging to his. “This,” she whispered, “This isn’t something I was prepared for. It should have been. I _knew_ it was a possibility. _I knew it._ But I didn’t want to see, so I blocked it out. I was _so stupid._ ”

  
“Hey,” Nick said quickly, pulling his hand out of her’s to place both of them on her cheeks, “Look at me.” She lifted her eyes to his face. “You were _not_ stupid to hope for the best. And _none_ of this is your fault. You hear me? None of it.” He gently stroked her still-wet cheekbones with his thumbs.

  
Thea suddenly leaned forward to press her lips against his, lifting her hands to frame his face in a mirror of his own pose. Shock coursed through him for a moment before he got a hold of himself and gently pulled away. He stood up, carefully not meeting her eyes so that he couldn't see the hurt on her face.

  
“You should try to get some sleep, okay?” he said softly. “If you need me, I’ll be in the other room.”

  
She nodded, looking away and he left the room to go sit in the darkness and light a cigarette and wonder exactly what the hell was wrong with him, while Thea lay in the bed wondering the same thing about herself.


End file.
